Perhaps it will help you get a better sense of what I’m talking about if I tell you one of my experiences with Focusing. If you’d prefer to hear me narrate this story, click the player below.
STUCK IN RESISTANCE
For almost a year I was lost in fear and resistance to creating this website. There was an intense inner conflict between something that wanted to spread the word about Focusing and something that did NOT want to do the website. I kept hearing critical thoughts like, “You’re too old to learn this technology. You’re stupid. Everyone already knows all this stuff. Who do you think you are?” Every time I went to write copy my thoughts were blocked, and I left the computer feeling frustrated and confused.
THEN I STARTED FOCUSING
After a few sessions with my Focusing Partners I was able to ‘stay with’ the part of me that didn’t want to do the website. As I was able to gently keep company with that part, it began to reveal to me how scared it was. It was afraid that I might be acting too soon and would do something that I would regret. It wanted me to do it “right,” from its perspective, so that I would stay on purpose. It didn’t want me to end up feeling vulnerable, embarrassed or ashamed. So it turned out that it was on my side all along, but I had been treating it as an enemy, something to get rid of.
AND THEN CAME THE SHIFT
In each session I received more information about the inner war. It arrived in pieces, like a puzzle. Then one day, as I sat listening to the scared part, something amazing happened – a shift! Something dramatically transformed inside me. The change didn’t arrive as words. Instead it came as a physical sensation of energy moving out of my head and landing in my chest and belly. With it came a feeling of deep calm and peacefulness. There was a radiant warmth devoid of thinking, yet effulgent with feeling and meaning. Captured within it was this insight: I had been trying to create the website from my head, my intellect, my habitual way of problem-solving. And that wasn’t working.
What life wanted for me was to write and create from my greater inner wisdom, not my mind. It became so clear, it was palpable. The confusion I had been experiencing was gone. I felt at peace. All the pieces had come together to form a completed puzzle.
THE HAPPY MOVEMENT FORWARD
And guess what? From then on the whole process became a joyful experience. I had delightful sessions with tech-savvy young men and women helping me with the intricacies of building a website. And I was doing something I have always loved – learning.
Had I continued to stay engaged in the inner turmoil, my website would be withering in a cyber holding cell. Now it’s live, and the energy that was trapped in me is emerging as renewed enthusiasm and true creativity.
WANT TO SEE HOW FOCUSING CAN HELP YOU GET UNSTUCK?
If you feel stuck in any area of your life, Inner Relationship Focusing can help. It is an inner resource readily available to you if you choose to use it. I’d love to show you how.
You can contact me through my website: www.focusinglifeforward.com or call me directly at (209) 483-0163.